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My First Love

Jacqueline Wanstall

Summer, 2021

Oh Bob Holness

You beautiful soul.

Your smile is a thousand pearly

stars.You tease my heart and mind,

With your riddles, word puzzles and cheeky wink

Every day at 3 oclock on channel 3.

Oh Bob Holness

I wish we could just run away.

We would be so happy together

Living in a rose covered cottage,

Surrounded by flowers, woodland creatures.

And baked pies cooling on windowsills.

How I long to spend my days

Kissing those pale, lined cheeks

And thin, lustful, elderly lips.

Oh Bob Holness

Won’t you write me back?

I know I didn’t tell you my full address

That’s because I don’t know it all yet.

But write me a letter anyway.

And tell me you love me too.

One day, when I’m older than six,

And I can actually unlock that bolt on my garden gate

We can finally be together.

I will wait for you always.

What word is an L that means me and you?


It is LOVE

And it is a blockbuster!

Jacqueline is a Ramsgate-based, socially-awkward, fat, funny ADHD creative and self-proclaimed lesbian icon. She was inspired to write this poem after coming across a letter her mum still possesses that she wrote to Bob Holness professing her love for him aged six.


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